The California Penal League of Fantasy Baseball

The California Penal League of Fantasy Baseball (CPLFB) is one of the highest levels of mixed league fantasy baseball in the world, consisting of teams that play in the North, Central and South Divisions. Teams draft players from a pool of both the American League and the National League.
The CPLFB was founded in March 2009 as Miss Corningstone's Hot Stove League, which was a reference to Christina Applegate's character in the popular film, Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy. The league was comprised of ten member organizations competing in two divisions (Caps and Sleeves), of which eight current teams were founding (charter) members (See below).
It became apparent near the end of the inaugural season that members of the league were drawing more inspiration, both in trash talk and team names from another popular film, closer to baseball roots, Major League starring Charlie Sheen, Tom Berenger and Corbin Bernsen.
Unlike Rotisserie Baseball Leagues, which crown a champion based upon an entire season's worth of statistics, the CPLFB employs the head-to-head system, where teams play one another throughout a schedule of 21 games. Teams accrue points based on a series of metrics, such as batting average, home runs, runs batted in, steals, wins and strikeouts in a weekly format where their statistics are measured against another team in the league.
Fantasy baseball received notoriety in 2004 in Sam Walker's book, Fantasyland, which detailed his entry into, and participation in Tout Wars. Tout Wars is widely regarded as the highest level of Rotisserie Baseball, including participants who tend to work in the baseball reporting industry. Walker helped introduce the masses of American fantasy baseball players to sabermetrics.
Sabermetrics, or advanced statistical baseball metrics, are often employed to help determine values for baseball players objectively.
In CPLFB, teams set a daily lineup for the weekly match-up. Simply put, the team with the most points at the end of the weekly match-up wins.
Current Teams of CPLFB
North Division
Chicago Abe Fromans (formerly San Diego Sex Panthers)...joined in 2009 (charter member)...GM Jeffrey McDaniel...2009 record 2-20...2010 record 6-16...2011 record 10-11...No playoff appearances.
Kawk Smen ...joined in 2011...GM Nick Walsh...2011 record 9-12...No playoff appearances.
New York City Goodfellas ...joined in 2009 (charter member)...GM Zack Akers...2009 record 12-10...2010 record 17-5... 2011 record 13-8...Playoffs 2010, 2011...North Division Champions 2010.
San Francisco AID-Bearers (formerly Utah Jazz Flautists)...joined in 2009 (charter member)...GM Shane Reed...2009 record 12-9-1 ...2010 record 14-8...2011 record 15-6...Playoffs 2009, 2010, 2011...North Division Champions 2011...Runner-up finish 2010, 2011.
Central Division
Aurora Sh*tty Beatles ...joined in 2010 (replacing San Dimas Circle K's)...GM Cory McDaniel...2010 record 4-18...2011 record 6-15...No playoff appearances.
Beantown Boyz (formerly Boston Braves)...joined in 2009 (charter member)...GM Joey Morrow...2009 record 5-17...2011 record 5-16...No playoff appearances...left at conclusion of 2009 season...rejoined in 2011, replacing Fightin Murphs.
Hatfish C*nter...joined in 2012...GM Drew Prince...replacing Smelly Pirates before 2012 season...Smelly Pirates ...joined in 2009 (charter member)...GM Eric McAmis...2009 record 12-10...2010 record...15-7...2011 record 10-11...Playoffs 2009, 2010, 2011...Central Division Champions 2009.
Dos Veces es Bonita (formerly Afternoon Delights, Sweet Lou's Wahoos)...joined in 2009 (charter member)...GM Jason Pennell...2009 record 14-8...2010 record 14-8...2011 record 17-5...Playoffs 2009, 2010, 2011...Central Division Champions 2011...CPLFB Champions 2010, 2011.
South Division
Appalachian Moonkricketz ...joined in 2011...2011 record 4-18...No playoff appearances.
DEEEZ ??? ...founded in 2009 (charter member)...GM Brandon McDaniel...2009 record 13-9...2010 record 14-8...2011 record 11-10...Playoffs 2009, 2010, 2011...CPLFB Champions 2009.
Downtown Floaters ...founded in 2009 (charter member)...GM Chris Reed...2009 record 12-10...2010 record 12-10...2011 record 16-5...Playoffs 2010, 2011...South Division Champions 2011.
Letem Seadem DD's (formerly Cause I'm Rick James)...joined in 2009 (charter member)...GM Adam Gray...2009 record 13-8-1...2010 record 9-13...2011 record 9-12...Playoffs 2009...Runner-up finish 2009.
History
2009
The league opened play on Opening Day, April 16, 2009. The season got off to a late start due to the World Baseball Classic. The ten charter teams played a 22 game schedule, with six teams qualifying for the playoffs.
During the 2009 season the San Diego Sex Panthers lost 20 games (though four of the first five were by a combined seven points), winning only two games all season. Both of these totals are still league records.
The San Dimas Circle K's were the top team during the regular season, amassing impressive wins over the first eight weeks of the season. The Circle K's and Sweet Lou's Wahoos were the front runners all season, each winning 14 games and earning first round playoff byes.
The Utah Jazz Flautists were slow starters in 2009, losing five of their first seven games (including the league's only tie) before turning things around en route to a playoff berth. The Jazz Flautists left for San Francisco and became the AID-Bearers. They have been one of the winningest teams in CPLFB history since that slow start, twice finishing as runner-up in 2010 and 2011.
The 2009 Playoff teams were DEEEZ ???, Cause I'm Rick James, the Afternoon Delights, the Smelly Pirates, the Utah Jazz Flautists and the San Dimas Circle K's. Cause I'm Rick James were the surprise of the playoffs, upsetting Sweet Lou's Wahoos by 40 points on their way to a title game berth.
DEEEZ ??? finished the season winning five in a row to qualify for the postseason as the fifth seed. They stormed through the playoffs, upsetting league heavyweight San Dimas on their way to winning the inaugural league championship.
Albert Pujols (DD's) was named CPLFB Most Valuable Player.
2010
Two new teams began play in 2010. The Aurora Sh*tty Beatles replaced the San Dimas Circle K's before the season began, while GM Blake Silvers's Fightin Murphs took over for the Boston Braves.
The 2010 regular season belonged to the New York City Goodfellas, who set the record for most wins in a single season with 17. NYC was second in the league in total points with 6619.3 on the season. The Smelly Pirates finished with a record of 15-7, earning a first round playoff bye.
Both of the favorites and division winners were upset in very close semifinal games, the Goodfellas to San Francisco by ten points and the Pirates to Sweet Lou's boys by five. Sweet Lou's Wahoos claimed their first CPLFB championship with a win over the San Francisco AID-Bearers in the title game.
Several lineup snafus occurred in 2010. Chicago lost an April matchup against Letem Seadem DD's when Adam Wainwright was left out of the lineup early in the week. The NYC Goodfellas dropped a pitcher the day before throwing a no-hitter in 2010 and 2011.
But by far the biggest lineup blunder belongs to Letem Seadem DD's. The DD's lost a matchup in May by 75 points when they left 94 points worth of pitching on the bench on the final day of the week, including a perfect game and a complete game shutout. It took several months before Letem Seadem peaked back onto the message boards in 2010.
Aurora and the Murphs were cellar dwellers, winning five and four games respectively.
The Downtown Floaters, another dominant team in 2010, set the record for most points ever scored in a game with 543.7 against Sweet Lou's Wahoos, who scored the second highest total of points in one game with 473 during the extended All Star week.
The league MVP was once again Albert Pujols (DD's) of the St. Louis Cardinals.
2011
The 2011 season marked the first year of expansion in CPLFB. Two new teams were added to the league, Kawk Smen and the Appalachian Moonkricketz. The league also expanded to three, four team divisions. As a result of expansion the regular season was shortened by one game to 21 games.
There were many surprises in 2011. Perennial losers, the Chicago Abe Fromans, began the season 5-1, including a major win over Sweet Lou's Wahoos in Week Three, and were 25 total points short of their first playoff berth.
The Aurora Sh*tty Beatles were a frisky team at times in 2011, winning a few big games along the way.
The regular season belonged to the Downtown Floaters and Sweet Lou's Wahoos as each team had record setting seasons. The Floaters won 15 games, thanks in large part to a major trade with Kawk Smen, which sent Jason Heyward and Jake Peavy to the Smen for Ryan Braun and C.C. Sabathia. Both Braun and Sabathia helped push the Floaters to a first round playoff bye.
The Wahoos were the heavyweight all season. They tied the league record for wins in a season with 17. They set a 21-game scoring record with 6614.6 total points. All this was a pre-cursor for what they did in the playoffs, winning both games by big margins en route to their second straight league title. This helps explain the name change for the 2012 season.
Blockbuster Trades
The first major blockbuster trade in CPLFB history took place in late July of 2009. DEEEZ ??? conditionally traded Chad Billingsley to San Diego for Cy Young candidate Roy Halladay. The Sex Panthers opted not to reacquire Halladay, and he was given a keeper tag by DEEEZ ??? for the 2010 season.
Prior to the 2011 season the Downtown Floaters and the Chicago Abe Fromans agreed to an offseason trade sending Atlanta Braves rookie, Jason Heyward, to the Floaters in exchange for Milwaukee Brewers pitcher, Zack Greinke.
The Floaters parlayed Heyward into a deal that helped propel them to a division title and a first round playoff bye in 2011 when they dealt Heyward and White Sox pitcher, Jake Peavy to Kawk Smen, for C.C. Sabathia (NYY) and MVP candidate Ryan Braun (MIL).
Expansion
The league expanded to its current 12 team, three division composition in 2011 with the addition of the Appalachian Moonkricketz and the Kawk Smen. The 2011 Expansion marked the first time that the CPLFB teams belonged to three divisions, which were geographically relative to the respective teams' bases of operation.
Significant Records
League titles...Sweet Lou's Wahoos (2) 2010, 2011; DEEEZ ??? (1) 2009.
Most wins (season)...NYC Goodfellas 17 (2010); Sweet Lou's Wahoos 17 (2011).
Most wins (all-time)...Sweet Lou's Wahoos (45).
Most Points (season)...Sweet Lou's Wahoos (6956.7) in 2010 over 22 games; Sweet Lou's Wahoos (6614.6) in 2011 over 21 games.
Most points (single game)...Downtown Floaters (543.7) in 2010 extended week; Downtown Floaters (427.7) in 2009 regular week.
Most points (single player)...Albert Pujols (986) in 2009 (DD's).
Most losses (single season)...Chicago Abe Fromans (20) in 2009.
Most losses (all time)...Chicago Abe Fromans (47) 2009-2011; Aurora Sh*tty Beatles (31) 2010-2011.
Lowest point total (single game)...Chicago Abe Fromans (63) in 2009 during the shortened All Star week.
Lowest Point total (season)...Boston Braves (4252) in 2009.
MVP Awards...Albert Pujols (DD's) in 2009, 2010, 2011.
All Time Team Won/Lost Records
1. Sweet Lou's Wahoos (2010-11)..........31-12;
Afternoon Delights(2009)..............14-8...Total.................45-20
2. NYC Goodfellas (2009-11)..............42-23
3. Downtown Floaters (2009-11)...........40-25
4. San Francisco AID-Bearers (2010-11)...29-14;
Utah Jazz Flautists (2009)............12-9-1...Total.........41-23-1
5. DEEEZ ??? (2009-11)...................38-27
6. Smelly Pirates (2009-11)..............37-28
7. Letem Seedem DD's (2010-11)...........18-25;
Cause I'm Rick James (2009)...........13-8-1...Total..........31-33-1
8. Chicago Abe Fromans (2010-11).........16-27;
San Diego Sex Panthers (2009)..........2-20...Total..........18-47
9. San Dimas Circle K's (2009)...........14-8
10.Aurora Sh*tty Beatles (2010-11).......11-32
11.Beantown Boyz (2011)...................5-16;
Boston Braves (2009)...................5-17...Total........10-23
12.Kawk Smen (2011).......................9-12
13.Fightin' Murphs (2010).................5-17
14.Appalachian Moonkricketz (2011)........4-17

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