Notion of Feminity

Much of what people do in society is a reflection of what they see in popular media. The way they dress, do their hair, or just live their life. Fifty years ago, popular media was telling women that staying home to cook, clean, and raise the kids should be their dream (Friedan 198). If they had the opportunity to do that, why would they need something else? In light of the feminist movement, one might ask; has this trend changed? Are women today different because more of them are going to school and getting multiple degrees? Friedan discussion about unsatisfied women in the 1950’s can be used as a lens to view women today. Women today are still faced with the same media expectations about how to be good mothers and wives. Still today, women who work are seen as bad mothers because they are neglecting their children (Douglas 237). However, it is not just women who work, women who stay home to raise their children can be bad mothers too if they don’t to everything just perfectly. The notions of femininity the sparked Friedan’s essay are still bothering many educated women today and not allowing them to fully enjoy motherhood and their careers.
In many colleges, more than half the graduates are women. However, in the work force less than half the employees are women (Belkin 2003). Why is there such a big gap between the women earning degrees and the women working? Many women start working after college, but then quit to raise their children after they get married. Lisa Belkin discusses this in her article, “The Opt-Out Revolution.” She interviews a group of eight women who graduated from Princeton and finds that only one is still working at her same job and she has not children (Belkin 2003). The others have quit their jobs to stay at home and raise their children. When asked why they chose to do this, most said it was just too overwhelming to do both (Belkin 2003). Keeping up with the standards of being a good mother are hard enough for a stay at home mother let alone a working mother. This might make one ask whether or not these women are also dealing with the “problem that has no name?” Once they quit their jobs and stay at home all day dealing with all the domestic issues, are they feeling empty and craving more? According to Belkin, several of the women she interviewed, talked about leaving their jobs regretfully. Times have changed, but trends have not really changed at all. Women are still forced to choose between home and work.
These women that choose their homes over their works are faced with popular notions of femininity and how they are applied to parenting. Friedan discusses the challenges women were constantly faced with in the 1950’s. They were showed how to be perfect mothers and wives and how to look good while doing it. They were told that they shouldn’t want anything more that a husband, some kids, and a house in the suburbs (Friedan 199). Women are told pretty much the same things today, but the only difference is the way they are told. Back then, the idea of staying home was directly taught to young girls (Friedan 201). Today, women are told to they should stay at home more indirectly by using things like commercials for house products that only target women (Douglas 239). Also, popular media has not stopped dictating what separates a good mother from a bad one. Mothers are still faced with outrageous standards of parenting (Douglas 238). They are expected to discipline their children to make good citizens without yelling or spanking. If children do something wrong, the first person people look at is the mother (Douglas 238). Not only are they supposed to run a perfect household, but also they are still expected to look good while doing it. TV shows like Desperate Housewives show housewives taking care of their children, cleaning, and cooking while wearing tight tops, jeans, three inch heals, flawless makeup, and long extensions that make her hair look perfect. In reality, that picture is far from the truth. It is impractical to expect a woman to wear those clothes and look like that while she has to do all this work and women understand this, but there is a bar that is set and many women feel like they have to meet it (Douglas 242).
Friedan argues that women want more than their husbands and children. They need more. Things must change in order for women to achieve this goal. She discussed this about fifty years ago. Things did change. More women started going to school, graduated with degrees, and married at a much later age. However, some things didn’t change. Most of these women still end up in the suburbs as stay at home mothers, and they are still faced with the same scrutiny as mothers of previous generations.
Much of what people do in society is a reflection of what they see in popular media. The way they dress, do their hair, or just live their life. Fifty years ago, popular media was telling women that staying home to cook, clean, and raise the kids should be their dream . If they had the opportunity to do that, why would they need something else? In light of the feminist movement, one might ask; has this trend changed? Are women today different because more of them are going to school and getting multiple degrees? Friedan discussion about unsatisfied women in the 1950’s can be used as a lens to view women today. Women today are still faced with the same media expectations about how to be good mothers and wives. Still today, women who work are seen as bad mothers because they are neglecting their children . However, it is not just women who work, women who stay home to raise their children can be bad mothers too if they don’t to everything just perfectly. The notions of femininity the sparked Friedan’s essay are still bothering many educated women today and not allowing them to fully enjoy motherhood and their careers.
In many colleges, more than half the graduates are women. However, in the work force less than half the employees are women . Why is there such a big gap between the women earning degrees and the women working? Many women start working after college, but then quit to raise their children after they get married. Lisa Belkin discusses this in her article, “The Opt-Out Revolution.” She interviews a group of eight women who graduated from Princeton and finds that only one is still working at her same job and she has not children . The others have quit their jobs to stay at home and raise their children. When asked why they chose to do this, most said it was just too overwhelming to do both . Keeping up with the standards of being a good mother are hard enough for a stay at home mother let alone a working mother. This might make one ask whether or not these women are also dealing with the “problem that has no name?” Once they quit their jobs and stay at home all day dealing with all the domestic issues, are they feeling empty and craving more? According to Belkin, several of the women she interviewed, talked about leaving their jobs regretfully. Times have changed, but trends have not really changed at all. Women are still forced to choose between home and work.
These women that choose their homes over their works are faced with popular notions of femininity and how they are applied to parenting. Friedan discusses the challenges women were constantly faced with in the 1950’s. They were showed how to be perfect mothers and wives and how to look good while doing it. They were told that they shouldn’t want anything more that a husband, some kids, and a house in the suburbs . Women are told pretty much the same things today, but the only difference is the way they are told. Back then, the idea of staying home was directly taught to young girls . Today, women are told to they should stay at home more indirectly by using things like commercials for house products that only target women
. Also, popular media has not stopped dictating what separates a good mother from a bad one. Mothers are still faced with outrageous standards of parenting . They are expected to discipline their children to make good citizens without yelling or spanking. If children do something wrong, the first person people look at is the mother
. Not only are they supposed to run a perfect household, but also they are still expected to look good while doing it. TV shows like Desperate Housewives show housewives taking care of their children, cleaning, and cooking while wearing tight tops, jeans, three inch heals, flawless makeup, and long extensions that make her hair look perfect. In reality, that picture is far from the truth. It is impractical to expect a woman to wear those clothes and look like that while she has to do all this work and women understand this, but there is a bar that is set and many women feel like they have to meet it
.
Friedan argues that women want more than their husbands and children. They need more. Things must change in order for women to achieve this goal. She discussed this about fifty years ago. Things did change. More women started going to school, graduated with degrees, and married at a much later age. However, some things didn’t change. Most of these women still end up in the suburbs as stay at home mothers, and they are still faced with the same scrutiny as mothers of previous generations.

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