Neopostmodernism

Neopostmodernism, literally "new after-modernism movement", is a school of thought originating in the suburbs of northern New Jersey. Practitioners, often writers, musicians and intelligentsia, open themselves to the comical faults of the everyday. Practitioners of neopostmodernism commonly revert to older standards of intellectualism, a departure from the norm of most recent artistic movements. Higher education and conservative lifestyles serve to counterpoint their, more often than not, absurd philosophical beliefs. Neopostmodernists are characterized by rampant paranoia.

The Early Years
Brewed in the suburban emotional squalor of northern New Jersey at the beginning of the 21st century, the founding neopostmodernists were first converted by the notion that by seriously considering building a time machine, in the distant future, and having said time machine never actually appear, time travel was proven irrelevant. This initial discovery (investigated by C.S. Schwarz in the short-story "Karl") opened the door to a myriad of others, each of which proved another facet of human existence the same as the last; pointless, and yet comical. Avoiding what they refer to as faults of previous generations, neopostmodernists often focus on the positive qualities of human nature. In Schwarz's story, for example, his blatantly neoepostmodernist protagonist, Karl Schmiedt, upon failing to receive his magical portal into the future of care-free existence, goes on a journey to discover the cause of the delay. Although he never accomplishes his goal, he witnesses first-hand the joys of living in the present, filled with paranoid librarians, blind tricycle races, deaf musicians and sodomite co-workers. Narrowly skirting the border between comic and tasteless, he offers the world comic insight into our own goodness.

Alan Steinberg
An epochal figure in the neopostmodernist movement is the mere concept of Alan Steinberg. Steinberg is, as described by Schwarz, a "middle-aged Jewish man" living in the center of the earth. Often used, endearingly, as a god or creator figure in neopostmodernist fairy tales. This level of importance given to Steinberg, coupled with the fact that his life is supposedly spent secretly ghostwriting every book published since the dawn of human consciousness gives insight into the minds of the neopostmodernists, namely that they value the literature, books, novels and poetry of the past over anything else. Since Steinberg actually writes every piece of literature in existence, neopostmodernists are confirmed that nothing seriously matters, their stories, songs, screenplays and poems are, in actuality, already being written, giving further emphasis on their general apathy.

Influences
Many neopostmodernists have cited influences from the past counter-culture movement of the 1960's and 70's in the United States. Works of satirical fiction are often glamorized by neopostmodernists as well; writers such as Woody Allen, Tom Wolfe, Ken Kesey, Jack Kerouac, Joseph Heller, Abbie Hoffman and Douglas Adams are often listed.

Notes and References
Schwarz, Craig Wesley. "An Autobiography" and "Insight into the Neopostmodernist Movement". Oak Ridge: Jefferson Community Press, 2007.

Schwarz, Craig Wesley. "Karl: A Neopostmodern Fairy Tale". Oak Ridge: Jefferson Community Press, 2006.

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