Science humour, like math humour is a branch of professional humour. There are several types of jokes within the field.
Humour about science
:Heisenberg is driving along the Autobahn and gets pulled over. The policeman asks, "Excuse me, sir, do you know how fast you were going?" Heisenberg responds, "Not at all, but I know precisely where I am."
This is a reference to Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle, which states that an observer cannot know both the location and velocity of a particle with infinite precision.
:Two scientists are sitting in a bar. A blonde walks by them and one of the scientists sighs "Why are blondes so attractive?"
:To this, the friend replies "because they are so dense."
This pun reflects on denser bodies containing more mass than other bodies of the same volume. The denser bodies then exhibit a greater gravitational attraction. Dense is, in many dialects of English, also synonymous with stupid, a trait often ascribed in blonde jokes.
:An atom is walking down the street when he meets a friend of his, who is evidently distraught. "What's the matter...is everything OK?" the atom asks his friend. "Well, I think I might have lost an electron," responds the other atom. "Are you sure?" asks the first. "I'm positive!" replies his friend.
This is a reference to the electron, an atomic particle, which possesses a negative charge. When an initially neutral atom loses an electron, it becomes an ion and acquires a positive charge.
Calculations and proofs
One important aspect of science jokes involves lateral thinking. For example, a student who, when asked to measure the height of a building using a barometer, might see how long it takes for it to fall from the top, rather than measuring the air pressure differential between the top and the bottom.
Other aspects of science humour are based around complex calculations or proofs which may combine observed phenomena/accepted science and mythology, folklore, or popular logical fallacies. These include:
* Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex, essay about how Superman could procreate
* Properties of Hell.
* speed on Christmas Eve.
* Thiotimoline, a fictitious chemical compound described by Isaac Asimov
Hoaxes
Elaborate proofs, when promulgated, can lead to hoaxes. It is important to discern that some hoaxes are intended to be jokes, whereas others are meant to be taken seriously. Others still may be social critiques (such as the Sokal Affair). As there may be difficulty in understanding the intent, some humorous hoaxes may even be taken as serious developments, leading to severe repercussions. One of the better known humorous hoaxes is the dihydrogen monoxide hoax.
Humour/stereotypes about scientists
Scientist jokes are jokes about scientists themselves, especially rivalries between different branches of science. Often they are in-jokes, ie - they tend to circulate within the scientific community itself, rather than be told by outsiders.
:A physicist, a mathematician, and an engineer are sitting around and one of them says "It says here that Professor X has come up with a new theorem that all odd numbers greater than 2 are prime". Each person present thinks to himself:
::Mathematician: 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, the rest follows by Mathematical induction.
::Physicist: 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is an experimental error, 11 is prime...
::Engineer: 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is approximately prime, 11 is prime, 13 is prime ...
::Mechanical engineer: 3 is prime, 4 is prime, 5 is prime, 6 is prime...
::Computer engineer: 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 7 is prime, 7 is prime...
This joke plays on the perception of different fields of science, especially differences between hard science and engineering
:A mathematician, a biologist and a physicist are sitting in a street café watching people entering and leaving the house on the other side of the street. First they see two people going into the house. Time passes. After a while they notice three persons coming out of the house. The physicist says, "The measurement wasn't accurate." The biologist says, "They must have reproduced." The mathematician says, "If one more person enters the house then it will be empty."
This joke relies on the fact that different disciplines take different approaches to mathematics; in particular, the mathematician sees no problem with there being a negative number of people in the house.
:An engineer, a physicist, and a mathematician are in a train and see a Scottish pasture with a black sheep in it. The physicist says "All Scottish sheep are black." The engineer says "At least one Scottish sheep is black." The mathematician says "In Scotland, there exists at least one field, which has at least one sheep, of which at least one side is black."
This joke again deals with the different burdens of proof used by different fields.
Some scientist jokes involve pick-up lines, and are often associated with scientists and engineers. [http://www.stetson.edu/~efriedma/mathhumor.html]
Visual humour
As in other fields of humour, some jokes are conveyed verbally, others are conveyed visually. Television series such as Futurama and Tripping the Rift often use such visual humour, such as Klein's Beer, based on the Klein bottle in topology.
Science humour in fiction
Elaborate science humour is often worked into science fiction parodies, such as the works of Douglas Adams, Isaac Asimov, etc. It may explain something confusing in this universe, or the mechanics of another using scientific reasoning. Terry Pratchett wrote a lengthy exposition about the "sluggishness of light" in "The Colour of Magic", regarding the speed of light in his Discworld. Adams wrote, in describing his Babel Fish:
Humour about science
:Heisenberg is driving along the Autobahn and gets pulled over. The policeman asks, "Excuse me, sir, do you know how fast you were going?" Heisenberg responds, "Not at all, but I know precisely where I am."
This is a reference to Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle, which states that an observer cannot know both the location and velocity of a particle with infinite precision.
:Two scientists are sitting in a bar. A blonde walks by them and one of the scientists sighs "Why are blondes so attractive?"
:To this, the friend replies "because they are so dense."
This pun reflects on denser bodies containing more mass than other bodies of the same volume. The denser bodies then exhibit a greater gravitational attraction. Dense is, in many dialects of English, also synonymous with stupid, a trait often ascribed in blonde jokes.
:An atom is walking down the street when he meets a friend of his, who is evidently distraught. "What's the matter...is everything OK?" the atom asks his friend. "Well, I think I might have lost an electron," responds the other atom. "Are you sure?" asks the first. "I'm positive!" replies his friend.
This is a reference to the electron, an atomic particle, which possesses a negative charge. When an initially neutral atom loses an electron, it becomes an ion and acquires a positive charge.
Calculations and proofs
One important aspect of science jokes involves lateral thinking. For example, a student who, when asked to measure the height of a building using a barometer, might see how long it takes for it to fall from the top, rather than measuring the air pressure differential between the top and the bottom.
Other aspects of science humour are based around complex calculations or proofs which may combine observed phenomena/accepted science and mythology, folklore, or popular logical fallacies. These include:
* Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex, essay about how Superman could procreate
* Properties of Hell.
* speed on Christmas Eve.
* Thiotimoline, a fictitious chemical compound described by Isaac Asimov
Hoaxes
Elaborate proofs, when promulgated, can lead to hoaxes. It is important to discern that some hoaxes are intended to be jokes, whereas others are meant to be taken seriously. Others still may be social critiques (such as the Sokal Affair). As there may be difficulty in understanding the intent, some humorous hoaxes may even be taken as serious developments, leading to severe repercussions. One of the better known humorous hoaxes is the dihydrogen monoxide hoax.
Humour/stereotypes about scientists
Scientist jokes are jokes about scientists themselves, especially rivalries between different branches of science. Often they are in-jokes, ie - they tend to circulate within the scientific community itself, rather than be told by outsiders.
:A physicist, a mathematician, and an engineer are sitting around and one of them says "It says here that Professor X has come up with a new theorem that all odd numbers greater than 2 are prime". Each person present thinks to himself:
::Mathematician: 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, the rest follows by Mathematical induction.
::Physicist: 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is an experimental error, 11 is prime...
::Engineer: 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is approximately prime, 11 is prime, 13 is prime ...
::Mechanical engineer: 3 is prime, 4 is prime, 5 is prime, 6 is prime...
::Computer engineer: 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 7 is prime, 7 is prime...
This joke plays on the perception of different fields of science, especially differences between hard science and engineering
:A mathematician, a biologist and a physicist are sitting in a street café watching people entering and leaving the house on the other side of the street. First they see two people going into the house. Time passes. After a while they notice three persons coming out of the house. The physicist says, "The measurement wasn't accurate." The biologist says, "They must have reproduced." The mathematician says, "If one more person enters the house then it will be empty."
This joke relies on the fact that different disciplines take different approaches to mathematics; in particular, the mathematician sees no problem with there being a negative number of people in the house.
:An engineer, a physicist, and a mathematician are in a train and see a Scottish pasture with a black sheep in it. The physicist says "All Scottish sheep are black." The engineer says "At least one Scottish sheep is black." The mathematician says "In Scotland, there exists at least one field, which has at least one sheep, of which at least one side is black."
This joke again deals with the different burdens of proof used by different fields.
Some scientist jokes involve pick-up lines, and are often associated with scientists and engineers. [http://www.stetson.edu/~efriedma/mathhumor.html]
Visual humour
As in other fields of humour, some jokes are conveyed verbally, others are conveyed visually. Television series such as Futurama and Tripping the Rift often use such visual humour, such as Klein's Beer, based on the Klein bottle in topology.
Science humour in fiction
Elaborate science humour is often worked into science fiction parodies, such as the works of Douglas Adams, Isaac Asimov, etc. It may explain something confusing in this universe, or the mechanics of another using scientific reasoning. Terry Pratchett wrote a lengthy exposition about the "sluggishness of light" in "The Colour of Magic", regarding the speed of light in his Discworld. Adams wrote, in describing his Babel Fish:
The Stone of Anamara (also known as "La piedra de Anamara" and "La pietra di Anamara") is a free creepy point-and-click online adventure game, created by Gabriel Rodríguez (Córdoba, Argentina), that spans multiple chapters.
In this first chapter, you uncover the story behind the asylum doctor, Alexander Graves, and the mysterious illness of one of his patients.
By moving the mouse gently, the scene will scroll slightly in all directions thus giving the illusion of being able to see all around you. To move, click on the arrows that appear as you move the mouse around. Use the hand cursor to pick up and activate various items and objects, enter doors, etc.
Story
“Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about seeking whom he may devour.” -- 1 Peter 5:8
In the early 1900s, a young guy named Ezequiel escapes from the police after robbing at a marketplace. He arrives at a Mental Asylum for Children used to treat mental diseases in young patients.
Afraid that the police may find him, he decides to hide inside the Asylum. As he makes his way into the building, strange things begin to happen.
Wondering around Ezequiel finds out that the place is deserted, and that a creepy murder took place there days ago. A little child died in a mysterious way inside the Asylum.
Characters
*Ezequiel — A young guy escaping from the police after robbing at a marketplace. He is the character you control through the game.
*Dr. Alexander Graves — He was in charge of the Asylum until he was arrested for the savage murder of a little girl.
*Anamara — A child abandoned by her parents, patient of Dr. Graves. She was found murdered at the Asylum.
Chapters
Chapter 1 - Release Date: August 2004. Gameplay: about 20 mins.
Chapter 2 - Release Date: Not released yet. Gameplay: n/a.
Contests and awards
* (2005).
* - San José, California (March 9-11, 2005).
* [http://www.adva.com.ar/codear/ 1st Prize Winner Concurso de Desarrollo Argentino de Juegos CODEAR (EVA04)] (2004).
In this first chapter, you uncover the story behind the asylum doctor, Alexander Graves, and the mysterious illness of one of his patients.
By moving the mouse gently, the scene will scroll slightly in all directions thus giving the illusion of being able to see all around you. To move, click on the arrows that appear as you move the mouse around. Use the hand cursor to pick up and activate various items and objects, enter doors, etc.
Story
“Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about seeking whom he may devour.” -- 1 Peter 5:8
In the early 1900s, a young guy named Ezequiel escapes from the police after robbing at a marketplace. He arrives at a Mental Asylum for Children used to treat mental diseases in young patients.
Afraid that the police may find him, he decides to hide inside the Asylum. As he makes his way into the building, strange things begin to happen.
Wondering around Ezequiel finds out that the place is deserted, and that a creepy murder took place there days ago. A little child died in a mysterious way inside the Asylum.
Characters
*Ezequiel — A young guy escaping from the police after robbing at a marketplace. He is the character you control through the game.
*Dr. Alexander Graves — He was in charge of the Asylum until he was arrested for the savage murder of a little girl.
*Anamara — A child abandoned by her parents, patient of Dr. Graves. She was found murdered at the Asylum.
Chapters
Chapter 1 - Release Date: August 2004. Gameplay: about 20 mins.
Chapter 2 - Release Date: Not released yet. Gameplay: n/a.
Contests and awards
* (2005).
* - San José, California (March 9-11, 2005).
* [http://www.adva.com.ar/codear/ 1st Prize Winner Concurso de Desarrollo Argentino de Juegos CODEAR (EVA04)] (2004).
Pathways Health and Research Centre is a specialised psychology clinic and health centre located in West End, Brisbane, Australia that was founded in 2003 by Professor Paula Barrett. The clinic specialises in the treatment of anxiety, depression, obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) and related adolescent/childhood disorders.
The specific services offered by Pathways Health and Research Centre include the Friends for Life Program , the FUN FRIENDS program adapted from the Friends for Life Program and designed specifically for 4, 5, and 6 year olds, the FOCUS program for the treatment of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, Steps-2-Manhood program, Learning to Learn program, educational assessments, specialized learning to learn programs for Autistic Spectrum Disorder, as well as programs for adults. Pathways has recently developed Friends for Sport, an adapted version of the Friends for Life Program.
The clinic is known mostly for the Friends for Life Program, created in 1992 by the clinic's founder, Professor Paula Barrett. The Friends for Life Program (FRIENDS) is the only anxiety prevention program acknowledged by the World Health Organisation for its twelve years of comprehensive evaluation and practice.
Professor Paula Barrett's work has been sited in Cochrane reviews on the topics of anxiety and OCD. The Cochrane anxiety reviews reference 7 studies conducted by Barrett, Dadds, Shortt and Lowry-Webster validating the FRIENDS Program. Further, the OCD reviews cite the FOCUS program as one of only three treatments that have been proven effective worldwide. FOCUS is the only treatment for OCD that has been proven to work that was developed in Australia.
Over the past four years in excess of 5000 kids have visited Pathways and more than 1000 have completed the FRIENDS program. Additionally, through Pathways Health and Research Centre at West End thousands of Queensland school teachers, Guidance Officers, Principals, social workers, allied health professionals and therapists have been trained in the FRIENDS program.
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The specific services offered by Pathways Health and Research Centre include the Friends for Life Program , the FUN FRIENDS program adapted from the Friends for Life Program and designed specifically for 4, 5, and 6 year olds, the FOCUS program for the treatment of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, Steps-2-Manhood program, Learning to Learn program, educational assessments, specialized learning to learn programs for Autistic Spectrum Disorder, as well as programs for adults. Pathways has recently developed Friends for Sport, an adapted version of the Friends for Life Program.
The clinic is known mostly for the Friends for Life Program, created in 1992 by the clinic's founder, Professor Paula Barrett. The Friends for Life Program (FRIENDS) is the only anxiety prevention program acknowledged by the World Health Organisation for its twelve years of comprehensive evaluation and practice.
Professor Paula Barrett's work has been sited in Cochrane reviews on the topics of anxiety and OCD. The Cochrane anxiety reviews reference 7 studies conducted by Barrett, Dadds, Shortt and Lowry-Webster validating the FRIENDS Program. Further, the OCD reviews cite the FOCUS program as one of only three treatments that have been proven effective worldwide. FOCUS is the only treatment for OCD that has been proven to work that was developed in Australia.
Over the past four years in excess of 5000 kids have visited Pathways and more than 1000 have completed the FRIENDS program. Additionally, through Pathways Health and Research Centre at West End thousands of Queensland school teachers, Guidance Officers, Principals, social workers, allied health professionals and therapists have been trained in the FRIENDS program.
----
The CASH line is a forward line of ice hockey players, playing for the Ottawa Senators of the National Hockey League (NHL). The members of the line include Daniel Alfredsson, Jason Spezza and Dany Heatley, who are all considered star players. The line is notable as a top offensive line, the top line for the Senators, and is widely regarded as one of the top lines in the NHL earning such quotes as 'best trio in the NHL', 'most dangerous line in hockey', 'high-flying trio' and 'potent first line' in the sports media and hockey fans, both of the Senators and other teams. In the last two seasons, 2005-06 and 2006-07, the trio have combined to score 175 goals.
During the 2007 Stanley Cup playoffs, the three players tied for the playoff lead in points, with 22 each, (Alfredsson having 14 goals) leading the Ottawa Senators to the Stanley Cup Finals for the first time in franchise history. During the Finals, Anaheim Ducks coach Randy Carlyle had to employ his top checking line and his two Norris Trophy-winning defencemen to stop the line. The name of the line is also appropriate as the team plays in the Scotiabank Place arena.
The players are popular also. The players have all appeared on the cover of The Hockey News several times. As of November 2, 2007, Alfredsson and Heatley are tied for third among active players with 6 appearances and Spezza has 5 cover appearances. Both Heatley and Spezza have appeared on video game covers.
Daniel Alfredsson
Daniel Alfredsson, who plays right wing, has played his entire NHL professional career for the Ottawa Senators, joining them for the 1995-96 season, winning the Calder Trophy for outstanding rookie in a season. He is the only Senator to win the trophy. He became captain for the Ottawa Senators in 1999, and has been their captain ever since. He has played in every playoff game for the Ottawa Senators in their history.
Since the line was formed, Alfredsson has recorded the two highest point totals of his career, 103 and 87 points. Daniel had an outstanding 2007 Stanley Cup playoffs, leading all scorers. He scored the overtime goal against the Buffalo Sabres in the Eastern Conference finals series to get the Senators to their first Finals appearance. He has scored over 300 goals in his career, 72 in the past two seasons alone since the line was formed.
He has represented Sweden in several World Championships and Winter Olympics, and was a member of the gold medal winning team in 2004. He is the first European NHL team captain of a team in the Stanley Cup Finals.
Dany Heatley
Dany Heatley, who plays left wing, joined the Senators in a trade in 2005 for Marian Hossa from the Atlanta Thrashers, where he had starred since being the second overall draft pick in the 2000 NHL Entry draft, winning the 2001 Calder Trophy. He had requested a trade from the Thrashers after a automobile crash in 2003 in which he was driving, which led to the death of a team-mate.
Since joining the Senators, his goal production has increased. He has scored 50 goals in the 2005-06 and 2006-07 seasons, the only player in the NHL to do so, and the first in over 10 years to do so. Both were higher totals than any individual season with the Thrashers. As of the end of the 2006-07 season, Heatley has scored 180 goals in 354 regular season games, and is considered 'the best pure goalscorer in the NHL'.
Notably, starting from his first game in his first season with the Senators, Heatley put together a 22-game consecutive point streak while a member of the line, the second-longest to Wayne Gretzky's 23-game streak while playing for the Los Angeles Kings after joining a new team. As of the end of the 2006-07 season, Heatley has played in every Senators game since he has joined the team.
Dany has represented Canada in several World Championships, including two gold medals in 2003 and 2004 and the 2006 Winter Olympics in Turin, Italy.
Jason Spezza
Jason Spezza, who plays center, joined the Ottawa Senators as a first-round draft choice, the third overall in the 2001 Entry Draft. The draft pick was obtained from the New York Islanders as part of the trade where Alexei Yashin went to the Islanders. He was widely regarded as a top-notch offensive player in junior hockey when he played for the Mississauga Ice Dogs of the Ontario Hockey League.
Former Senators coach Jacques Martin was reticent to use Spezza during his first years in the league, because of his concern about Spezza turning over the puck to the opposition, famously bowing to fans' pressure to play him in the 2003 playoffs in the fifth game of a Conference Finals series against the New Jersey Devils and the Senators were behind 3-1 in games. The addition of Spezza sparked the team and the team would take the series to seven games before losing. The arrival of Heatley in 2005-06 created a potent combination of scorer and set-up man. Spezza has now recorded his top two seasons, recording 90 (71 assists) and 87 (53 assists) point seasons playing with Heatley.
Spezza was chosen as a substitute for Team Canada in the 2006 Olympics, but did not see action.
On September 11, 2007, Spezza was featured on the cover of the NHL 2K8 video game. He is the first Senator to be on a sports game cover.
During the 2007 Stanley Cup playoffs, the three players tied for the playoff lead in points, with 22 each, (Alfredsson having 14 goals) leading the Ottawa Senators to the Stanley Cup Finals for the first time in franchise history. During the Finals, Anaheim Ducks coach Randy Carlyle had to employ his top checking line and his two Norris Trophy-winning defencemen to stop the line. The name of the line is also appropriate as the team plays in the Scotiabank Place arena.
The players are popular also. The players have all appeared on the cover of The Hockey News several times. As of November 2, 2007, Alfredsson and Heatley are tied for third among active players with 6 appearances and Spezza has 5 cover appearances. Both Heatley and Spezza have appeared on video game covers.
Daniel Alfredsson
Daniel Alfredsson, who plays right wing, has played his entire NHL professional career for the Ottawa Senators, joining them for the 1995-96 season, winning the Calder Trophy for outstanding rookie in a season. He is the only Senator to win the trophy. He became captain for the Ottawa Senators in 1999, and has been their captain ever since. He has played in every playoff game for the Ottawa Senators in their history.
Since the line was formed, Alfredsson has recorded the two highest point totals of his career, 103 and 87 points. Daniel had an outstanding 2007 Stanley Cup playoffs, leading all scorers. He scored the overtime goal against the Buffalo Sabres in the Eastern Conference finals series to get the Senators to their first Finals appearance. He has scored over 300 goals in his career, 72 in the past two seasons alone since the line was formed.
He has represented Sweden in several World Championships and Winter Olympics, and was a member of the gold medal winning team in 2004. He is the first European NHL team captain of a team in the Stanley Cup Finals.
Dany Heatley
Dany Heatley, who plays left wing, joined the Senators in a trade in 2005 for Marian Hossa from the Atlanta Thrashers, where he had starred since being the second overall draft pick in the 2000 NHL Entry draft, winning the 2001 Calder Trophy. He had requested a trade from the Thrashers after a automobile crash in 2003 in which he was driving, which led to the death of a team-mate.
Since joining the Senators, his goal production has increased. He has scored 50 goals in the 2005-06 and 2006-07 seasons, the only player in the NHL to do so, and the first in over 10 years to do so. Both were higher totals than any individual season with the Thrashers. As of the end of the 2006-07 season, Heatley has scored 180 goals in 354 regular season games, and is considered 'the best pure goalscorer in the NHL'.
Notably, starting from his first game in his first season with the Senators, Heatley put together a 22-game consecutive point streak while a member of the line, the second-longest to Wayne Gretzky's 23-game streak while playing for the Los Angeles Kings after joining a new team. As of the end of the 2006-07 season, Heatley has played in every Senators game since he has joined the team.
Dany has represented Canada in several World Championships, including two gold medals in 2003 and 2004 and the 2006 Winter Olympics in Turin, Italy.
Jason Spezza
Jason Spezza, who plays center, joined the Ottawa Senators as a first-round draft choice, the third overall in the 2001 Entry Draft. The draft pick was obtained from the New York Islanders as part of the trade where Alexei Yashin went to the Islanders. He was widely regarded as a top-notch offensive player in junior hockey when he played for the Mississauga Ice Dogs of the Ontario Hockey League.
Former Senators coach Jacques Martin was reticent to use Spezza during his first years in the league, because of his concern about Spezza turning over the puck to the opposition, famously bowing to fans' pressure to play him in the 2003 playoffs in the fifth game of a Conference Finals series against the New Jersey Devils and the Senators were behind 3-1 in games. The addition of Spezza sparked the team and the team would take the series to seven games before losing. The arrival of Heatley in 2005-06 created a potent combination of scorer and set-up man. Spezza has now recorded his top two seasons, recording 90 (71 assists) and 87 (53 assists) point seasons playing with Heatley.
Spezza was chosen as a substitute for Team Canada in the 2006 Olympics, but did not see action.
On September 11, 2007, Spezza was featured on the cover of the NHL 2K8 video game. He is the first Senator to be on a sports game cover.