Shmuel Breban

Shmuel Breban is an Orthodox Jewish, American stand-up comedian known for his sharp and unconventional style, blending logic and absurdity, often through misdirection. He is fond of the use of comic devices such as the one-liner and the Paraprosdokian.
Biography
Breban was born in Brooklyn, New York, and currently resides in Cedarhurst, New York.
Breban began performing stand-up comedy in 2002. smart comedic stylings gained a cult following on the New York club scene and the Jewish comedy circuit.
He writes the Super Syndicate & Sundown series, featuring various superhero and science fiction stories.
Personal life
As analyzed in his act, Breban lives with his mother and genuinely exhibits frugality. Breban has described himself as Jewish, with the addendum, “And more religious than you.”
Quotes
• “Growing up, my mom told me that I could be anything I wanted to be… so I chose financial—burden.”
• "I just bought a whole bunch of diet books. Not for myself; I mail them anonymously to every woman that rejects me."
• “Do you know why kosher meat is way more expensive? … Jewish animals are better negotiators.”
• “My friend has difficulty sleeping, but I can do it with my eyes closed.”
• “I used to believe that chiropractors were charlatans, but then I went to one, and now I stand corrected.”
• “I live in a two-income household, but who knows how long my mom can keep that up.”
• “Did you know that the only Israeli gold medal in the history of the Olympics was in sailing? Further reinforcing the stereotype that Jews don’t tip!”
• “I was having difficulty deciding if I wanted to purchase this bed I was looking at, so the salesman told me... sleep on it.”
• “I recently purchased a yo-yo at a flea market for just 15 cents -- No strings attached!”
• “If you are allergic to alcohol... can you take shots for that?”
• “U2’s lawyers work pro Bono.”<ref name="The Humor List"/>
• “The clothing shop near me had a pregnant mannequin in the window for a couple months, but now there’s just an identical, regular mannequin, and they pretend like nothing happened, but I know she had an abortion.”

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