The White Van

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The White Van is a British comedy written by comedians Bohdan Dawyd and Matthew Nicholas. It is a 'mockumentary’ sitcom based around the lives of two fictitious white van drivers (Terry Chaucer and Dave Shakespeare) and their associates. The series itself documents the pair of young men trying to live up to the stereotype of the white van man, which was first invented by the BBC’s Sarah Kennedy in 1997. Writing began in March 2007 and work was completed in July. The script was edited from August to early November and was finally sent to the BBC's Writersroom in late November. Currently the script is being reviewed by the BBC.

Plot
A documentary is being made about two subjects of Prime Minister David Cameron's ‘Give the keys to your van to a hoodie’ scheme. The purpose of the documentary is: to follow two young men throughout their van journeys and the various adversaries they encounter, in order to discover the truth behind the ‘White Van Man'. Terry and Dave like to think of themselves as savvy, accomplished businessmen but are in fact a pair of idiots. Their interaction with each other, their associates, rivals, victims and the rest of the world provides much of the humour.

Main characters

Terry Chaucer

Terry claims to have been well educated because he was supposedly predicted AAB grades for his A-Levels. His reason for not going to University was that he didn't want to end up 'nine grand in debt'. Terry never achieved his AAB at college as he decided to leave (but was actually thrown out for Dave Shakespeare's benefit). After this he joined the T.A but only served for two months due to a being caught playing Russian Roulette with a Russian lady who consequently was killed. When Terry was tried for murder at the Crown's court he was acquitted. He spent the next year on the dole and in doss houses. Terry's luck changed when Prime Minister David Cameron introduced the ‘Give the keys to your van to a hoodie’ scheme and claimed a van. This is when Terry's old college mate left higher education to join him doing odd jobs and wheeling and dealing.

Dave Shakespeare

Dave is a year younger than Terry, however they have been friends since they were both children. At college, Dave's education began to suffer due to Terry and his antics. Because of this Terry was thrown out of college, however, Dave was left thinking Terry had left due to his own accord. When Dave found out that Terry had been thrown out of college, he had an argument with college principal (Baldy) and decided to leave. Dave then joined Terry on his adventures in the white van.

Other recurring characters

Baldy - The principal of Terry and Dave's old college.

Sally L - Terry and Dave's geography teacher from college.

Dave L - Sally's husband, a good friend of Terry and Dave.

Tommy 'Gun' Goldsmith - The third white van man who is in prison.

Interviewer - The documentary interviewer.

Jeff Lazzey - A friend of Terry and Dave. He is seriously injured in each episode.

Keith Le Beef - Terry and Dave's mentor.

Mr John Mann - The local Chinese take-away owner.

Jerry Clarendon and Steve Bilbie - The silver van drivers, Terry and Dave's rivals.

The Nurses - The woman who live below Terry and Dave who they are trying to pull.

Trev - The landlord of Terry and Dave's pub.

Please note that any resemblance these characters may bear to real people is coincidental.

Episode guide
Episode 1

The first episode introduces Terry Chaucer and Dave Shakespeare by a trip to Halifax where go to a car-boot sale, a conference and a school to give a speech on white vanning. Back in Nottingham they encounter trouble at their Chinese take away with their rivals and try it on with the nurses from downstairs! The majority of characters are introduced in this episode and the others are mentioned.

Episode 2

The second episode sees Terry and Dave selling drinks bought from the cash and carry in a pub car park. After being spotted by the police they decide to call it a day and go see their old teachers from college. Terry and Dave seem pleased to see their old teachers, however, the teacher aren’t too happy about their return. From interviews with the teachers, we learn more about Terry and Dave’s past and how they were led into white vanning. The episode ends with Terry and Dave trying to sell drinks to the college canteen, with security not being to happy about it.

Episode 3

Terry and Dave receive a phone call from their agent telling them to get down to a local recording school to fix a roof. For Terry and Dave, this is a chance to hit the big time with a contemporary band wanting to collaborate. However the recording studio manager isn’t too happy about the guitar work and vocals Terry tries to get on the album as the roof is yet to be fixed. They eventually get to work on the roof but are however, scared off by some local kids throwing stones at them. The second half of the episode sees Terry and Dave preparing for a night out on the town. We follow them to Hooters, a karaoke bar and a dancing competition. Terry and Dave also get lucky with the nurses from downstairs when they see each other in a bar.

Episode 4

A journey to France to pick up a package for Terry and Dave’s agent seems like a good idea for a short holiday (and a chance to get hold of some cheap booze). We follow the white van drivers across the Channel and see the trouble they cause with a gang of French blue van drivers, who they challenge to a football match. Terry and Dave also encounter trouble with Customs, but the RSJ modification on the van saves the day.

Episode 5

Because Terry and Dave are decent blokes, they take a mini-bus of Manchester United fans to Old Trafford, who get quite drunk. After the sing-along on the bus they get to the match. After a win by United the fans are in such a good mood, Terry decides to take a shortcut through Leeds. The mini-bus pulls up at a building site, where Terry and Dave open the doors and let 16 enraged drunks out to do as much damage as possible. When they hear police sirens everyone jumps into the back of the mini-bus and are driven back to Nottingham. Terry and Dave celebrate with a trip to the Chinese-take away. They also take a trip downstairs to see those nurses.

Episode 6

The final episode sees the third white van man being released from prison, Tommy ‘Gun’ Goldsmith. However he hasn’t actually been released and has broken out. Terry and Dave pick him up in the van and don’t realise he has escaped from prison. The white van men go to Wollaton to find Dave L but meet Sally instead. They decide to show her their scheme for the cigarette factory. Dave fires the flare gun out of the window at the factory. Sally goes mad at the sight of this and runs into the factory shouting, and is then killed by an explosion. A police chase ensues which ends by Terry parking the van in the lock up in full view of the police. The three white van men are caught. Then there are mug shots of the main characters and what happened to them. The series ends with Terry, Dave and Dave L in the Blue Bell. Dave L buys the lads a Guinness each, to thank them for ending his marriage. Terry winks and says ”Cheers Dave!”

The series has been left open for either a second series or follow up episodes.

Tour
In October 2007 it was announced that there would be a live show in aid to support the script whilst it is being reviewed by the BBC. The Full Throttle Tour is scheduled to start on the 22nd February 2008 at a private show in Nottinghamshire. Currently there are booked dates forEngland and Spain with a possibility of dates being added for Scotland and Wales.

Official poster for the 2008 Full Throttle World Tour

Radio interview

On 01/05/07, writers Bohdan Dawyd and Matthew Nicholas was interviewed for BBC Radio Nottingham's morning show. The writers posed as characters Terry and Dave and left the interviewer, Frances Finn stunned at their answers. The interview was about the No1tingham campaign. When Dawyd was asked about what he thought of the campaign, he answered: "Yeah, we’re gonna put erm, the sticker in the van. Put it in the back, advertise it a bit. It’s a good scheme though, beautiful city, beautiful square, beautiful day… You can’t beat it can you?". Earlier on in the interview Nicholas was told he was from Nottingham, to which he bluntly replied "I'm actually from Arnold."

Trivia

*In a mockumentary it unusual for characters to be killed off. However, in episode one a Russian lady is killed in a game of Russian Roulette. This is seen as CCTV footage when Terry was in the T.A. Also is episode six, Sally L is killed when she runs into a burning cigarette factory after Dave fires the flare gun at it. Terry and Dave are both indirectly responsible for each passing but are not prosecuted for them. Jeff Lazzey is nearly killed off in each episode, however he survives six near death encounters and is seen alive and well in the pub at the end of episode six.

*A bent RAF officer gave Terry the van as a part of David Cameron's scheme.

*The surnames of the van drivers have been named after streets around the college that Bohdan Dawyd used to go to (and Matthew Nicholas still goes to). Chaucer, Shakespeare, Goldsmith, Bilbie and Clarendon are the street names.

*Terry claims to be Anglo-Italian and his surname is pronounced 'Cahucer' back in Italy. However he doesn't mind being called Chaucer, as that is how it's spelt. Terry can do a good American-Italian impression.

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See Also

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