Harry Potter and the Secret Chamberpot of Azerbaijan

Harry Potter and the Secret Chamberpot of Azerbaijan is a parody of the Harry Potter film series as part of the 2003 Comic Relief appeal. It is a combination of scenes parodying Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets, and behind-the-scenes and interviews with the "cast". The film features Dawn French playing a female Harry Potter (and Daniel Radcliffe), as well as Jennifer Saunders and Miranda Richardson as Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger. French and Richardson would both star in the actual film series.
Synopsis
The film parodies scenes from the Chamber of Secrets and fake interviews with the film actors. Harry Potter (and Daniel Radcliffe) has become a woman "overnight" and expresses great pride over his cleavage. Returning to Hogwarts for his second year of studies, Harry reunites with Ron Weasley, depicted as a mumbling coward who screams a lot, and Hermione Granger. Beforehand, Harry is warned by Dobby the house elf (played by Basil Brush) not to go to Hogwarts. Backstage, Rubeus Hagrid's actor Ronnie Corbett expresses his difficulties working with Harry since he is now a woman, his breasts leaving Ronnie unable to get an eyeline.
Harry goes into the Great Hall at Hogwarts, where the teachers observe him from afar: Albus Dumbledore who winks a lot and speaks slowly, complaining Minerva McGonagall, Severus Snape who is self-obsessed, and Hagrid. Ron receives a "Junk Howler" much to Harry's irritation. The backstage scenes continue, McGonagall complaining about saying the same lines repeatedly, and Basil Brush claims he portrayed Gollum in The Lord of the Rings film trilogy. The next scenes show Harry and Ron flying about in the old Weasley car, nearly getting hit by Thomas the Tank Engine (parodying the Hogwarts Express) and Harry receives a phone call whilst dangling out of the car. After filming the scene, Radcliffe tells Rupert Grint that he will get his own cleavage sooner or later.
The film also has interviews with J.K. Rowling, played by Joanna Lumley, who fails to understand the process behind the films and claims she wrote the books on wet wipes. Dumbledore and Snape reveal they have not read the books, and Radcliffe discovers his invisibility cloak has shrunk. The teachers participate in the filming of scene and leave the director hapless with their inability to understand his instructions. Later, Harry, Ron and Hermione walk down a corridor whilst Harry speaks Parcel Force (a parody of Parseltongue) where they witness a message appear on the wall reading "The Chamberpot has been emptied." They then spot a petrified Mrs. Norris lying on the ground as spiders (on strings) crawl over her. The teachers appear, Hagrid using a step ladder to view the situation and Dumbledore believes Harry's claims of innocence.
The teachers continue their complaints backstage, Ronnie Corbett claiming he gets no money even though toys based on his appearance are released. Harry appears ready to play Quidditch much to the group's irritation. In the following Quidditch match Harry meets his rival Draco Malfoy, played by Alex Ferns parodying his Eastenders character Trevor Morgan. The two chase each other, Malfoy hitting Harry repeatedly until Harry steps off his broomstick in mid-flight and smacks Malfoy over the head with it whilst floating in midair.
The film ends with a fake promotion for the next film Gobs of Fire, with a "younger, more flat-chested Harry Potter."
Cast
* Dawn French as Harry Potter/Daniel Radcliffe, now a wisecracking woman.
* Jennifer Saunders as Ron Weasley/Rupert Grint, portrayed as a mumbling wimp.
* Miranda Richardson as Hermione Granger/Emma Watson
* Joanna Lumley as J.K. Rowling, claiming to have written the books on the back of baby's wet wipes.
* Nigel Planer as Albus Dumbledore
* Jeremy Irons as Severus Snape
* Alison Steadman as Minerva McGonagall
* Ronnie Corbett as Rubeus Hagrid
* Alex Ferns as Draco Malfoy
* Basil Brush as Dobby the house elf

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